Last night I went with my friend R.B. to the Russian and Turkish Baths in the East Village. At first I was a little hesitant about going, since a lot of the reviews I read about it mentioned the rampant sexual harassment that occurs there. And then I thought, is that really a negative? And decided to give it a try. You pay $30 for a day pass and stay as long as you want. They do massages and shaves, and you can get beaten with a thing that looks like a broom made out of leaves. I got there promptly at 7:00pm and was supposed to meet R.B downstairs, but I couldn't find him, so I just went in on my own. I was expecting to see a bunch of old Russian men in towels, sitting around with their wieners showing. Instead, there were tons of attractive people in their 20's and 30's walking around in bathing suits. It was like being at the beach, but with no sand in my ass. There were different steam rooms and saunas and a freezing cold plunge pool that you dunked yourself in when you got hot. There was also a "Russian Steam Room" that I walked into and immediately walked out of. It was the hottest place I have ever been in in my life. I worried that I might die. Later, R.B. convinced me to go back in there and it was okay as long as you sit on a low step. When people got hot, they grabbed a plastic bucket full of ice water and dumped it over their heads. It was crazy.
Everyone was incredibly friendly and it was a very laid back atmosphere. R.B. knew lots of people, and we went from room to room, chatting with everyone and sweating. It was like this whole other society in New York that I never knew existed. After I started to prune, I told R.B. that I'd had enough. I took a shower and got changed in the locker room, which was the only unpleasant part of the experience. It was really small and there was wet carpeting on the floor and I had to be naked in front of strangers, which I don't like. But other than that, it was a very interesting way to spend a Sunday night. I even forgot I was unemployed and broken hearted for a couple of hours. A+
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