My Name Is M.N.......

And I'm a P.O.aholic.
I realized yesterday when I was foolishly hanging out with P.O. that I might be addicted to him.
I haven't really been addicted to anything before, so I'm not sure, but it seems like the
symptoms are all there. I think about him constantly. When I can't have him, I am prone to
violent outbursts, I have to hide him from my friends and family, sometimes he makes me
late to work, when he leaves I feel sad and empty. According to my addict friends, that's exactly
how one feels when they are hooked on drugs. Finally I can relate to drug addicts!
I also feel a lot of shame, which I'm pretty sure is another sign. The shame comes from the fact that
I know I need to quit, but I feel like I am powerless over my addiction.
I'll quit for a week or two, but then I'm right back where I started, drunk text messaging and hating myself.
I feel like I'm in a shame spiral.
I know that the only thing that will help is if I can find a distraction from my addiction.
Maybe I'll go shopping after work.