Oh Baby

So I had lunch with R.B. today and decided to tell him how I'm getting sick of how difficult it is to make plans with him.
Anytime I try to get together with him, we go back and forth via text message and then end up not hanging out.
It's very annoying and I just don't really feel like playing games with someone at this point.
I'm not interested in having a boyfriend right now, so I don't feel like I need to be going through a bunch of effort to hang out with someone. I just want some sex and maybe someone to see a movie with once in a while.
Anyway, I had asked him if he wanted to go to a party with me on Saturday night and he said he had to go to a baby shower on Sunday. I asked what that had to do with the party on Saturday and he said that the shower was for his baby. What now?
Turns out, some girl he used to date is pregnant. And she's having the baby. So he explained that he has been acting kind of shifty and weird because he has a lot going on in his life right now. I'll say.
He's also having knee surgery, though I didn't find that nearly as disturbing as the whole baby thing.
Looking for the silver lining, I asked him if I could call him daddy if we ever had sex, and he said yes.
I just wanted to see if I could get something sexy out of this whole un-sexy situation.
Luckily I'm not really interested in him as a boyfriend, only as the owner of one of the largest hogs I've ever felt.
So the baby thing shouldn't be too big of an issue for me.